Hope you had an amazing Easter and are looking forward to the beautiful months ahead.
Lately, I’ve been asked a question that seems to reoccur over and over again for many years now.
“Wendy how did you do it? How did you transition from your life as a victim of domestic violence and losing 80lbs to winning awards, writing bestseller books and being so inspirational?”
My response is this: The day I made the decision to push through my fears and start believing in myself and believing that the process of achieving health & getting my life back could work for me…it did.
It doesn’t matter what your problems are or how long you’ve held on to them you can be free of them today. You have to let the resentment go, let the fear go and stop being angry with what happened to you in the past. Forgive yourself and others so you can be set free. TODAY you can experience miracles if you set the intention and make the decision that (come hell or high water) you will be stronger, healthier, wealthier or have more satisfying relationships. Once you decide things will magically align and be in divine order.
It works for me every time.
This process can be challenging but nevertheless achievable. If I can assist you in how to break down this process so it works optimally for you please do not hesitate to contact me by email at: firstname.lastname@example.org
I’m looking forward to the month of May because it’s my birthday which feels like Christmas for me!
Sparks fly with online parties, LIVE presentations (May 23rd- Register below)
AND my private coaching specials plus other products – 30% off all month long!
So look out for all of it on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, see my website at wendyida.com under the tab “work with Wendy” or just send me an email and ask me about my birthday specials.
Hot dog! So nothing is stopping you now! Let’s party!!!
Does age have you by the throat because you’re feeling like you don’t matter anymore or somebody told you that you’re too old, too sick or too tired to make a difference in the world? NONSENSE
If you ascribe to any of that chatter I guess you didn’t hear that times have changed! AARP, however, is making sure more people get the message through their Magazine and videos and I am honored to be among them this month.
See for yourself…Click Photo.
The good news is…it’s not too late for you to become a part of this change. Whether you are over 40,50, 60 or more –these are the most exciting times of your life. Contrary to what some believe you can STILL make an undeniable impact in the world.
If you’ve lived this long you have the gift of WISDOM, but you have to use it wisely if you truly desire to make an impact and not waste it on trivial things.
You also have POWER if you have wisdom and that power can make a tremendous impact on your life and the lives of others around you.
The question however is…will you choose to take advantage of your gifts.
You have two choices. You can be a bystander and wait for life to play out for you OR you can get there with intention and take control of every opportunity regardless of how uncomfortable you feel. As a result, you can have the best joy ride of your life!
I am committed to the joyride. What are you committed to?
To get your mojo back you have to: Stay relevant, Get creative, Stay active and reinvent yourself.Otherwise, you lose that spark and become old and outdated.
This is your lifeline.
Here’s what I know. Taking good care of yourself in the way you know you should is often difficult. Busy days and nights take its toll on our bodies, minds and souls that causes our motivation to wane.
I get it. Been there done that. I know how daunting that cycle can be. But here’s what I also know. You can rise up out of that cycle. You CAN do better and I am dedicated to giving you the tools you need to succeed.
If you are ready to make a change, but finding it difficult to do so and…
If you find yourself staring at the walls because you don’t know what to do next, let me know and I’d be happy to point you in the right direction.
Isn’t it time you trusted yourself enough to do something different so you can get different results.REAL RESULTS!
For more information on how you can work with me send me a note by clicking here –> https://wendyida.com/contact/
Dreams Don’t Work Unless You Do — So Get Ready to Take Action
I’ve met all kinds of people over the years, at all ages and stages — and all different kinds of “ready”. Are you READY to embrace your new life? Keep reading…. You could be closer than you think! Which one of these sounds like you?
1. READY AND ROLLING
These people have already taken the first steps toward embracing change in their lives. They KNOW what works for them. They KNOW what they want to achieve. And they’ve already reshaped their lives to make room in their life for the changes that they’re seeking. What does someone like this need with a coach? STRUCTURE and KNOWLEDGE. Even an elite athlete like Serena Williams has a coach to help her stay on top of her game. Many celebrities at the top of their professions do the same.
IF THIS IS YOU, then the one thing you need to remember is to be OPEN to your coach’s guidance. You’ve gotten this far. Your coach can help you reach new levels of greatness — IF you let her.
2. READY AND WILLING
Some people are so READY to change that they’re practically leaping off the starting line — they just need a little push to get going, and some motivation to stay the course. They’ve realized that their current habits and mindset are working against them. They have a pretty realistic idea about where they want to go, even if they don’t have all the details worked out. What these people need is ACCOUNTABILITY and GUIDANCE. They need someone to stay with them, to help them keep moving toward their goals, and to help guide them through the decisions down the road that they haven’t anticipated.
IF YOU ARE HERE, then trust me — when you get rolling, you are going to do great things. The important thing to do is to LISTEN to your coach. And give her FEEDBACK, too, about what really works for you and what’s only OK. Let’s be honest — once you start, not every day is going to be super-fantastic goal-smashing. Change is hard work, and it takes time! But over time you will see your goals getting closer and closer. And the next thing you know, you’ll be making new ones.
3. READY AND WAITING
Some people WANT to change their lives… or at least they want their lives to change. But they can’t quite see HOW to take the first step, or they have trouble believing that they can really do it. These people are right on the cusp — the tipping point of being READY. It’s a special place to be. We’ve all been there. What people need most at this stage is ENCOURAGEMENT to take the plunge, and INSPIRATION to trust their vision for a better future.
IF THIS IS WHERE YOU ARE, take heart! You’ve already taken the first step toward change, just by realizing that things don’t have to stay the same forever. Think about your vision and what your first step toward it is. Ask yourself what’s holding you back from that first step. Often it’s a practical concern like money or family. I get it! Sometimes reality has you under a rock, and you feel you need stay there to protect yourself — personally, financially, or otherwise. Concerns like this can look like huge, insurmountable roadblocks, and make you feel like you’re not READY.
But hang on! You’re closer to READY than you think. Trust your vision. Start figuring out what to do to make room in your life for the changes you want. Push ahead and commit to that action. And when you do… guess what? Doors WILL open. It’s true! New resources or opportunities will come through that you didn’t expect — because you never asked. Roadblocks will come down… or you will find a different route. It happens when you “go all in” and commit to action — and it doesn’t happen until you COMMIT.
What do you need from your coach at this stage? First, you need someone who will help you refine your VISION and design a roadmap to make it reality. Second, you need someone to help you understand your PRIORITIES and carve out space for you amid the chaos of uncertainty. Most importantly, you need a coach who will focus on your whole life, not just one part of it.
So let me ask again…. Are you ready? Maybe a better question is — what are you ready FOR? However far along you are in transforming your life, take confidence! When you take action, look out — change will blossom in your life!
Ready…. Set…. Go!
A few months ago, a trainer based in Atlanta contacted me on Facebook asking if I would leave an encouraging word for one of his clients. 58 years old, 5 feet-4 inches tall, with two adult children, she had struggled with motivation until her trainer showed her a few photos of me, and then gave her my book, Take Back Your Life.
“There were several similarities in your story and hers,” he wrote to me. “You became a living, breathing visual aid that gave her a clear picture of where in fitness I was trying to take a woman her age. Your example took away all of the excuses that could possibly haunt her.”
I’ve been working in this business for over 22 years now helping people reinvent their lives, but it’s always a little breathtaking to hear that I’ve been a source of inspiration in helping someone turn the corner on their goals—even (or maybe especially) when I’ve never had the pleasure of meeting them personally. What a blessing and an honor!
Don’t get me wrong…. I’m aware that I’m an inspiration to other people. Looking back on MY story even inspires me! That’s one of the reasons why I decided to take this path and do what I do. It was the best thing I could do to make use of the gifts I’ve been given. The fact that it took me 40-plus years before I uncovered those gifts just makes the whole experience that much sweeter.
But hear me when I say this: YOU can be an inspiration, too. Whether you believe it now or not.
I hear you saying, “No, not me.” Yes, you! BUT… there are two things you need to do first.
FIRST, you HAVE to take care of you.
Take care of you by honoring yourself and cleaning your own “house”. Your body. Your mind. Your long-term health. Your personal safety. This is NOT selfish! When you do this, you honor your Creator—because your life and your body are gifts, and you are honoring the Giver by taking care of them.
SECOND, get yourself a TEAM.
It’s not easy taking control of your life, and you shouldn’t do it alone. Find your tribe. The ones that “get” you. The person that has stuck with you through it all. The gang down at the gym that is rooting for you. The friends that love dancing to the same music you do. A co-worker or classmate. A teacher. Or a coach—that’s what we’re here for! Finding my tribe is how I made it to where I am now—sticking with me through hell and back! Unconditional love from your support team is what will help you shut out your fears and become empowered.
And as you enjoy the company of your tribe and start to get your own house in order, guess what…? People will notice. Your family, your kids. Friends and coworkers. Even folks in the grocery store… at the bus stop… in the deli where you grab lunch. These people already see you almost every day. And as they see the changes you’re making, you WILL become an inspiration—a living, breathing example that makes their excuses evaporate.
There’s a quote I like that says, “Be strong—you never know who you are inspiring.” But there are many different kinds of strength. Physical strength. Determination. Strength of character. The courage to take the first step. The courage to keep showing up and moving a little bit closer to your goals every day. You don’t have to sit in fear. You don’t have to keep moving in circles.
Decide to honor yourself, and find your tribe. Then you’ll find that you can have the life you’ve always dreamed of. AND you can live and act in a way that inspires other people to make positive changes in their lives, too!
Because you never know who is watching!
I enjoy watching my granddaughter Aubrey watch me… AND mimic my moves!
I’ve said it before and I’m saying it again…. Exercise is just a small part of the story when it comes to overall fitness and healthy living. Your mentality—your mindset and your commitment to yourself—are the most important factors. But you also need to pay careful attention to what you’re putting IN your body. You know that good, healthy food is important. But there’s an important step that a lot of people miss: CLEANSING.
Cleansing prepares your body to absorb and use ALL of those good nutrients that you’re eating. Preparing your body ahead of time to use and absorb what you eat is the step most people miss!
Think about this…. If you bought a fine vase, you wouldn’t display it on a table strewn with old magazines and television remotes, would you? Of course not. It would take away from the beauty and more importantly the function for which it was intended. The same is true with your body. Cleaning on the inside will prepare it to function the way it should, to the highest possible degree. That’s why I say—what you put in your body is just as important as what you do with it.
Cleansing is not as hard as you might think, either. I’ve found a really gentle cleanse that is easy on your body and can be done by the most squeamish person. By the way, I’m squeamish. (LOL!) So I was careful in choosing. I’ve always supported doing a cleanse, but in the past I didn’t necessarily recommend a particular cleansing program because some don’t have good scientific research to support their claims. However, I’ve found a cleanse now that gets consistently good results and has been confirmed by a number of well-designed clinical studies.
Why should you cleanse?
Well, besides making you feel like a million bucks and kick-starting a healthy nutritional lifestyle, cleansing has two other huge benefits. First, it actually helps you lose fat, not muscle—including visceral fat (the abdominal fat deep within your core, around your organs) that is tied to a higher risk of heart attacks and Type 2 diabetes. It also helps your body flush out toxins—especially environmental toxins that you have absorbed over the years—which are stored in fat cells.
Other benefits include
- Supporting healthy aging by reducing age-related tissue damage
- Improving athletic performance for both men and women
- Improving blood vessel health
- Enhancing weight loss and improving body composition
- Supporting long-term weight maintenance
One of the big differentiators in the cleanse I use is that it helps your whole body, all the way down to the cellular level! Not just your gastrointestinal tract, but also your liver, colon, circulation, and your lymphatic system. And it reduces inflammation throughout your body. Compared to people on a standard “heart-healthy” diet, both men and women on this cleansing plan lost more weight and more body fat (twice as much visceral fat) and saw greater improvements in cardiovascular health. They also found the plan convenient and easy to stick to, unlike the conventional dieters in the studies!
It’s no secret that cleansing is the best way to start your healthy lifestyle!
If you desire weight loss, better energy, performance training, or just aging gracefully, I can help connect you with the right system to meet your goals. The system I use is easy and flexible and comfortable for any busy lifestyle. On top of that, I’ll stick with you to help you stay with it and get the most out of the cleanse!
Cleansing is a great way to start your journey to finally reaching your goals and dreams. But it’s only one step. Consistent, good nutrition is also important. More talk on that coming up in my subsequent blogs!
Want to learn more about my cleansing program? Send me an email at email@example.com!
THE BEST KEPT SECRET TO REACHING YOUR GOALS!!
Are you feeling stuck while others seem to be getting their groove on? Have you ever wished you could press the fast-forward button to reach your goals and dreams too? Well, believe it or not, YOU CAN!
So have no fear because the answer is clear. The fact is… you may need a coach!
The best of the best have coaches. Actors like Tom Cruise, Julia Roberts, and Denzel Washington all have coaches. Business moguls like Larry Page of Google and Howard Shultz of Starbucks have coaches. That’s why they are great! I have a coach, too—and it has made all the difference in helping me move ahead at a faster pace.
What does a coach do?
When you commit to a big life change, getting a coach may not be the first thing you think of. There are so many do-it-yourself guides, apps, websites, gyms, classes…. With all the information and tools out there, you can put together your own program. Right?
Well, maybe some can. There are lots of things people can do on their own. But it may be harder than it has to be. And the results won’t be as good or lasting as they could be. And the risk of failure—or giving up—are high! (Ask an experienced real estate agent how “For Sale by Owner” home sales work, and they’ll tell you: “Not well!”)
In the 1800s, the word “coach” was college slang for someone that helped “carry” a student over the finish line with exams. It was later used with sports teams, but originally it meant a one-on-one relationship. Someone that gets from where you are now to where you want to be in the future—that’s a coach, pure and simple.
A coach’s specific qualifications will depend on the subject area, but in all cases the coach brings three things to the table: structure, accountability, and my favorite: MOTIVATION!
A coach’s job is to help you get to your goal. This means, first, helping you understand your desires and set a good, achievable, realistic end goal—as well as interim goals to keep you on track.
What do I mean “achievable” and “realistic”? Think of it like this: if you’re five feet tall and an adult past your growing years, then “being 5’8” tall” is not a reasonable, achievable, or realistic goal for you! (No matter how much milk you drink or visualization you practice!) Working seriously toward that goal is only likely to make you less healthy and less happy—and anyone who says they can help you probably doesn’t have your best interests at heart.
As a coach, I would want to know instead, “Why do you say you want to be taller? What do you mean? What are you seeing in your head?” Is it a healthier you? More confident? Poised? Successful? Well, that’s different! Those are achievable—and height has nothing to do with them.
Besides understanding your desires and setting goals, a coach also helps you understand and tackle the work to get there. This is important, because there is so much information out there—some good, some not so good. You could read a whole library of books before finding an approach that works for you. Or… you can talk to a coach, who has read lots of those books, put those methods—and others—to the test, and helped people in circumstances similar to yours.
“Today we’ll start with X and go on to Y…” “Next week, we’ll talk about Z…” A coach brings structure by setting the agenda—for the month, the week, the day, the hour, or just the next ten minutes—so you don’t have to stop and figure out what to do next. Instead you can keep your momentum and energy focused on working hard.
This brings me to another thing every coach provides. Progressing along your path to success requires accountability. This CANNOT be overstated. If structure is the roadmap, accountability is what keeps you tuned up and ready to roll.
You might think you can have accountability by yourself or with an app. Well, let’s think about that. An app—like a book or a checklist—is just a tool for focusing your own willpower. It can be a good place to start. It can provide a little structure, maybe nag you with notifications. But when things get hard, it’s easy for you to stop checking in—to ignore or turn off the notifications, or even delete the app. And no one is there to ask you why!
Change is hard. Relying on your willpower alone can make you feel like a failure when things get tough. Face-to-face accountability with a real, human coach can keep you going even when you feel tired or frustrated.
What about a friend or group of friends? Again, yes, to a point. It is important to have friends that support you. But when you leave your comfort zone and start making tough changes, a friend may not be able to give you the accountability you need. After all, they like you and want to help—and seeing you struggle can be hard. A coach accepts the responsibility to push you even when it’s uncomfortable, and to encourage you even when you complain! This does not mean they will harm you—a good coach will never bully, belittle, or injure you, or push you to injure yourself. But when you experience discomfort (and you will!) she can help you deal with it and understand why it’s happening.
So a coach gives you structure by confirming your destination and mapping out a way to get there. A coach also brings accountability, especially when things get tough. But there’s more. A coach gives you motivation. This is what keeps you moving down the path toward your goal—cheering you along, setting the next hurdles, and giving you perspective by reminding you why you wanted to change, and helping you see how far you’ve gone. A coach can’t do the work for you—that’s your job. But she can provide the structure to help you grow, get out of your comfort zone without getting hurt, and stay motivated.
So if you’re thinking about making a change in your life—a real, lasting, substantial change—a coach can give you the structure, accountability, and motivation you need to cross the finish line and embrace the future you desire and deserve.
Go for it! Put a coach in your back pocket today!
I am still basking in the glow of Janelle Monáe’s words at the Grammy Awards last week: “We come in peace, but we mean business.” Wow.
She was talking about women in the music industry—and I am so proud of her and other women for seizing the creative reins, bringing their message to life, and calling out the culture of inequality in the industry. But in a more general sense, I find these are great words to live by, especially when you are working toward a goal of transforming your life. I’ll tell you why.
“We come in peace.”
If you are really going to prepare yourself for long-term change, one of the first things you need to do is find peace. In two ways.
First, you have to make peace with the past. Stop rehashing your old struggles—with parents, school mates, teachers, ex-es, bosses. Whatever ghosts of failures past you have (real or imagined), let them go. They do not define you. You have successfully woken up every day up to now. You are here. And that means you have a starting point. You have the ability to forgive yourself—for not being perfect, and also for expecting yourself to be perfect. And you can forgive other people for the same things. After all, they’re humans, too, just like you. This frees you to see the positive side of what you have been, and what you can become.
You also need to make room for peace in the present. This means claiming time for self-care. Indulge in a relaxing bubble bath. Spend some time alone to plan your week—maybe even try on your work outfits and set them out. Take a few minutes each day to sit quietly and let your mind roll to a stop. Meditation doesn’t have to be complicated or time-consuming, and it has long-lasting benefits. Just a moment to be thankful for the good things of the day, celebrate what you’ve achieved, and forgive yourself for things that didn’t go as planned, is all it takes to bring you back to the center—and then move again in a positive direction.
“We mean business.”
OK, now that you have laid the groundwork, you can approach those long-term changes the same way you approach your life’s work. Because it is your life’s work! The evidence of your life is you. Don’t just think or read about working out. Schedule it. Treat it like a doctor’s appointment. Don’t just collect healthy recipes. Treat the contents of your grocery cart like medicine—good things, in the right amounts. Find someone to whom you are accountable. Maybe that’s your spouse or a friend—or maybe you can hire a coach or trainer. Yes, making these kinds of changes takes commitment. Yes, it takes planning. Yes, it is work. (Although that doesn’t mean it can’t also be fun.) So take a business-like approach to keep yourself on track.
Come in peace, but mean business.
Good health, and the good life, are so much more than physical. And your mindset is the key to making a successful change. Physical changes are just the most visible aspect of the more important changes in focus, forgiveness, acceptance, and attitude. Make peace with your past. Make room for peace in the present. And mean business!
If you know someone who could use a boost, please pass this along!
Photo by Matt Sayles/ Invision/AP/REX/Shutterstock
It’s January! Time to make your New Year’s Resolution, right?
All cards on the table: I do NOT believe in making New Year’s Resolutions. Why not? Because, at the end of the day, in my experience, they just don’t work, and can even end up working against you. If you stick to your resolutions, you might experience short-term gains, but if you can’t, you’ll just wind up with long-term frustration.
What’s the matter with New Year’s Resolutions?
Think about how you might phrase a typical Resolution:
“In 2018, I resolve to….
“…eat more vegetables.”
“…spend more time with my kids.”
The problem with these resolutions is the word “more”. What does “more” mean?
If you currently eat no veggies (just for the sake of argument!), and start eating a carrot a day, are you keeping your resolution? What if you drop to every other day? What if you stop eating carrots and switch to veggie pizza? Or processed veggie chips? Are you still being “good”?
The problem with the word “more” in these resolutions is that it’s not measurable. And most importantly, it doesn’t provide any information about what you actually want to achieve by making these kinds of changes.
You might think that a lack of structure in a resolution would make it easier to achieve. If you’re at zero, then anything is an improvement, right? But the looseness of these kinds of statements makes it easy to overdo it—and then feel like a failure if you can’t keep up the pace. It can also make it easy to “underdo” it and then taper off after a while when you don’t “feel” any different. Either way, you end up right back where you started—waiting for next year to make another resolution.
Let’s consider a different kind of resolution:
“In 2018, I resolve to….
“…get a promotion.”
“…get a new client every month.”
“…publish a book.”
Well, OK, these sound measurable, don’t they? The problem here is that too many of the factors influencing these outcomes are out of your control. You might do everything right, work your tail off, and win the love of your clients and management—but if your industry hits a rough patch or your company has lay-offs, you may still not be able to “keep” your resolution. Simply put, you can’t make resolutions for how other people are going to act.
These are just a couple of reasons why I don’t believe in making New Year’s Resolutions. But what I DO believe in is setting goals—and then living toward your goals. Goal-making is a PROCESS that starts with the one ingredient that resolutions often overlook: what you want to achieve, and who you want to become in the future.
With goal-making, it’s OK to start big and general, for example: “I want to have a healthier lifestyle.” But we don’t stop there. The next step is asking, “What does a healthier lifestyle mean?” or even better, “How will I know when I’m living a healthier lifestyle?”
Maybe your answer to that question is, “I’ll know I’m healthier when my resting heart rate is less than 80 BPM,” or “I’ll know I’m healthier when my doctor says my cholesterol is in a healthy range.” So then, the next step could be to say, “OK, what can I do to improve my resting heart rate?”
Now we’re getting somewhere, and we’re in a position to make a good, evidence-based plan with concrete actions. Both cardio and weight training have been demonstrated to improve resting heart rate. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recommend at least 150 to 300 minutes of moderate aerobic exercise—or 75 to 150 minutes of vigorous exercise—every week, plus muscle-strengthening activities at least two days a week. Now we have a target to work toward. And if 2½ hours of brisk walking a week isn’t possible for you right now, you can set additional interim goals until you work up to that level.
This is just one example of one kind of goal. Your goals might relate to health and fitness, or nutrition, finances, your career path, or your family life. The key is the PROCESS: start with a vision of what you want your life to be like, and then gradually add definition to that vision until you arrive at specific, achievable goals with measurable results.
Besides PROCESS, the other big difference between making goals and making resolutions is GROWTH. Rather than just “keeping” a resolution, we continually advance toward our goals. And when we reach a goal, we celebrate and then set another—propelling ourselves along into the future, step by step.
In my last blog post, I mentioned the “Ten-Year Rule” — in ten years, which choices will you look back on and be glad you made? This is one technique you can use to get started thinking about long-term goals. I’ll talk more in a later blog post about other tips for goal-setting, the kinds of questions you can ask yourself, and the kind of plans you can make.
In the meantime, tell me—what kind of goals do YOU want to set? Not just for 2018—but for “future you”?
Write and let me know—I’m eager to help you take back your life!
Happy new year, everybody!
How are you managing this holiday season so far? I’ll tell you why I ask.
For many of us, the holidays are a time of great joy. This time of year encourages the best in human nature to shine through. We see family and friends that we may not see any other time of year. We also can experience the joy of giving, be it a gift to family members or time spent helping those in need. I think we can all agree that the overall spirit of the holidays is one that we should all strive to achieve year round!
Unfortunately however, this time of year can also bring hectic schedules and unique pressures, along with stress and chaos, which can upend our otherwise healthy and focused mindsets.
What is it about this time of year that creates stress?
There are many potential triggers hidden amongst the mistletoe and festive music. Scheduling conflicts are a major stressor for all of us, and this is especially true during November and December.
In addition to your regular weekly or monthly schedule, the holiday brings a myriad of other time commitments waiting to be honored. You have to decide which ones you want or need to make a priority. Often, we overschedule ourselves during this time of year, not wanting to offend anyone. So we end up promising our time to every holiday party, volunteer event and children’s play we are invited to, but guess what?
That isn’t always the healthiest choice for you…right?
It wears you out doesn’t it? That’s not good!
Trust me, I’ve had to make changes in my own life. So I know how it feels.
So, how can you prioritize and streamline your schedule for a holiday season that everyone can enjoy?
- First, think about which holiday events you and your family most enjoy. Those should get first priority in scheduling.
- Next, consider the holiday events and invitations that are important – and why you consider them important? Has your granddaughter asked you to come see her play on the same night that your company party is being held?
I like to use the Ten Year Rule in these cases. In ten years, which choice will you look back and be glad you made? Instead of stressing out, create your holiday schedule based on your intrinsic values. Then, act with confidence. If you must decline an invitation, do so politely. When it’s appropriate, explain the reason you can’t volunteer or attend an event. I’ve had to tell people, “I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to make it. I’m volunteering that day, and the shelter is counting on me.” In my experience, most people will understand and even respect your decision to prioritize the things close to your heart.
Coordinating holiday schedules with your family can be even trickier. Whose home will host Christmas this year? Which sides of the family will you and/or your children celebrate with, and on which days? This can be the most challenging time of the holidays to finesse, and, sometimes, it’s impossible to avoid conflict. Work with every member of your family to find out what they’re expectations are – and don’t wait until the week before Christmas. Try to remain as flexible as possible – if you can’t be with your grown children on Christmas morning, make sure you demonstrate a willingness to celebrate on a different day. After all, the important thing is that you will all be able to celebrate as a family.
I wish you lots of love, health and happiness as you make your way through this joyful holiday season!
How do you maintain your sanity during the chaos of holiday scheduling?
Do you have a schedule that helps you decide when the holidays are celebrated with different branches of your family? Are there certain events or activities that you always make time for?
Write me and let me know – I’d love to hear from you!
As you all know, I’m a big believer in taking back your life at any age. In fact, I’ve been called “America’s #1 Expert on Looking Fit, Fierce and Fabulous After 40.” I believe that helping women just like you is my true calling in his life. However, as a 65-year-old mom and grandmother, I understand the insecurities and doubts that can creep in as you get older. Those same doubts can keep you from taking action day after day, year after year. That’s why today is the day to kick those doubts to the curb, and start taking back your life one step at a time. One of the best ways to get started is changing your diet, and the way you think about food.
Why is changing your diet – and the way you view food – so important? Because so many of us have a complicated, and sometimes unhealthy, relationship with food. Food is wonderful. The foods we eat feed our bodies, allowing us to achieve our goals and achieve optimal levels of health and wellness. However, those same foods can contain harmful ingredients, excessive fats and sugars and other additives that harm our health and keep us from reaching those same goals.
Get What You Need From Food
Our ideal relationship with food should be one of balance. Educate yourself on what your body needs, and at what age. Which nutrients are key, and why are they important? Your first dietary goal should be to get what your body needs to be its best. That means enough protein, enough fiber, enough calcium … you get the idea. No diet should ever reduce your food intake to the point that you aren’t getting the nutrients you need to thrive.
Minimize What You Don’t Need
Once you’ve ensured that your diet is meeting your body’s needs, start focusing on minimizing the things you don’t need. Yogurt, for instance, is a great source of protein, calcium and helpful gut bacteria. If you like yogurt, take a look at the brand you currently enjoy. How many grams of sugar does it have per serving? How does it compare to other brands? Is there a healthier option you could try? Kefir, a drinkable yogurt, is often lower in sugar and has been used as part of healthy diets for hundreds of years.
Leave Room for What You Love
A diet that is too strict, with no room for treating yourself, is one of the fastest ways to failure. While you may maintain a diet like this for a while, eventually you’ll start craving those favorite foods that you no longer allow yourself. Plus, if you do slip up and indulge, you’ll feel like you’ve failed, which makes you more likely to call it quits. So leave room for a little bit of what you love. There are many ways to do this – you can find a lower calorie alternative, or use portion control to keep track of how much you’re eating. Allow yourself a treat on the days you’ve worked especially hard at the gym, when you’ve burned enough calories to minimize the impact of your indulgence. And, lastly, enjoy! It IS okay to treat ourselves. It is NOT okay to binge eat ourselves into a coma.
At 65 years young, I know that it takes focus, dedication and discipline to live your best life regardless of age, and this includes a healthy and balanced approach to the foods you eat. Cleansing is also important. Cleanses give you more energy, focus, help you to absorb all the good nutrients u take in, helps to avoid illnesses and gets rid of body fat. In fact, there is a 30 day cleanse I use all quite often. If you’re interested in finding out more about the cleanse I use, just send me an email.
I love helping people change their relationship with food and fitness.
Tell me, how have you changed your relationship with food.
What strategies do you use to maintain a great relationship with the foods that nourish you?
Let me know in the comments below!
It’s that time of year again and I want to express my thankfulness outwardly for my health, your health, and our piece of mind.
I am so grateful for our desire, determination and willingness to be the best versions of ourselves. I am thankful for my family, my friends, new opportunities, stepping stones, growth, learning and teaching.
I have to confess, there’s something I need to tell you…
I AM THANKFUL FOR YOU!
Thank you for messaging me, sharing stories about how you’ve reclaimed the happiness in your life. Thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for allowing me to share my story with you. I am so grateful that, together, we ARE and WILL CONTINUE to live the life we so desire.
We are FIT, we are FIERCE and we are FABULOUS!
I know we’ve all had our share of trials and tribulations, but that is a part of growth. Overcoming the struggles of everyday life, and the limitations that society places on us is a true testament to our resilience. Life has a tendency to throw everything at us at once. We find ourselves constantly on the go, focusing on what’s to come and how we’re going to execute our next plan.
When things get hectic, I find thanksgiving to be the perfect time of year to slow down, pause and take some time for self-reflection. Here in our community, we’ve discussed a range of issues including: self-love, self-worth, becoming healthy, staying healthy, getting our sexy back, being risk takers, the power of our minds, the power behind focusing on and realizing our goals. As I look back at how far we’ve come, I can’t help but be proud of our progress.
We are a family, and family looks out for one another.
Thanksgiving is one of those holidays where we often go overboard with what we consider treats. Here’s a friendly thanksgiving reminder and challenge from my heart to yours: Please don’t lose sight of your goals and what you’ve already accomplished. Remember… We eat for the person we are tomorrow. It IS okay to treat ourselves. It is NOT okay to binge eat ourselves into a coma.
Here are 10 of my favorite thanksgiving tips:
- Use smaller plates
- Eat smaller portions
- Make healthy versions of your favorite dishes
- Make it a family event to get in a quick and fun 20 min workout
- Dance! Nothing like a good tune to get that heart rate fired up
- Try not to eat too late at night. Give those carbs time to digest
- Eat slowly. Give your brain a chance to register that your stomach is full
- Drink water. Don’t confuse thirst for hunger. Aim for 1 glass of water per glass of alcohol
- Eat breakfast and lunch. This can stop you from overeating at dinner
- Have that desert. You can still try that savory dish! Focus instead on moderation
Our bodies WILL thank us the next day. The year is almost over, go out with a big bang. Stay true to your health. It should be your #1 priority. We must set examples for others to follow. That in itself is an outward expression of gratitude.
It’s always a pleasure to chat with you all and share. I get such a rewarding feeling hearing from y’all. Again, I thank you. After thanksgiving, let me know how you’ve spent your thanksgiving weekend, what you ate (I’m always open to recipes), if you’ll have them tasty leftovers for days, and how it felt saying no to overeating those delicious foods.
I appreciate you.
I’m so proud of your achievements.
I’d love to know below… What will you be thankful for NEXT YEAR?
Whatever it is, make a plan for it TODAY.
Halloween’s come and gone, with kids everywhere dressing up, running around and experiencing pure joy. It’s a beautiful thing to see, whether it’s neighborhood children or your own kids and grandkids. But did you dress up? If you’re anywhere near my age (and I’m 65), probably not. Did you dress up when you were younger? If so, when did you stop – and why? Dressing up as someone or something else can be sexy for adults.
Many people seem to lose touch with their sexual selves as they get older, because they may no longer feel they are or can be sexy. Fortunately, that’s not true (hey, ask Betty White!). Here are five great ways to explore and enhance your sexual self at 40 – and for decades to come.
Now is the perfect time of year to play with the idea of roleplay. Whether you dress up as a sexy pirate or a naughty nurse, costumes can be liberating for both parties in a relationship, allowing you to explore new roles and have fun at the same time!
Take Care of Yourself
You may be asking yourself, “What does this have to do with feeling sexy after 40?” The answer is everything. Regardless of your body type, if you’re not taking care of yourself physically and emotionally, you’re probably not going to feel sexy and confident. I find this to always be true for myself. If I’m not eating right, not exercising and not tending myself, I don’t have the sexy confidence I need to have a healthy sexual relationship.
Try Blind Dates
Blind dates are a great idea – sexy, fun and exciting. I’m not talking about the usual blind date, where you meet someone you’ve actually never seen before, though those can be fun too. A few months ago, I got a text simply saying, “I’ve noticed you around, and I can’t take my eyes off of you. Would you like to go out to dinner on Friday?” It was my husband, who proceeded to treat the whole thing like a first date with a crush. It’s a refreshing way to reconnect, and it makes you even more grateful for the relationship you have.
Connect with People You Admire
Many of us are acutely aware of those around us – at work, at church, in our neighborhoods. Find a role model, someone who is your age or older, who seems to really own their confidence and sensuality. Make friends, talk with them, and learn more about how and why they refuses to give up their groove. Surrounding yourself with people you admire is always a great life philosophy – and who knows, maybe some of their joie de vivre will be contagious. Use the examples of other powerful, sensual, strong women to develop some affirmations about your own power and sexuality, and remind yourself of them daily.
Contact is Key
There are a lot of things that seem to stand in the way of a vibrant sex life – confidence, the demands of family, insecurities. One thing that is absolutely vital to help you and your partner maintain a healthy sexual relationship is pure human contact. We often take it for granted, but it feeds our spirit and strengthens our relationship. When contact with the one you love becomes a regular part of your lives, it will automatically lead to a stronger and more connected sexual relationship, regardless of age!
Connect with me today! 🙂
What are some of your favorite daily affirmations? Let me know below.